Food fixations come in many forms. Addiction to overeating is the most common form and there is also bulimia, anorexia, and a combination of both. In the centre of all of these food fixations, there is a tendency of intimacy deprivation, which emotionally is defined as the feeling state of emptiness. This results in pain, and so whether it is to do with food or its to do with any other form of addiction like alcohol or drugs, the reality is that all of these addictions have a tendency to be started in relationship, and so every single time a person pulls out their favourite food, their favourite drink, or their favourite drug, etc. they are also pulling out their friend.
As with food, compulsive behaviour can be with money, relationships, busyness, and anything that gets in the way of healthy relationship. It becomes a distraction from the nightmare of emptiness. Healing, means being no longer wounded, that whatever our obsession or compulsion or addiction is it no longer is present in our body. Healing is also to do with the deepening of our spirit, and also that we actually incorporate whatever our injury is into who it is that we are. The injury still exists, but is no longer in control.
We have a tendency to brush off traumatic events and relational wounds. We ignore them, but the truth is, they did happen, and they are the source of our greatest strengths, but are also the source of our shame and shadow material. The goal with healing is not to diminish the reality of the personal wounding. When pain and fear set in, people have a tendency to isolate themselves, and the unfortunate thing that supports depressive living, is isolation. People become trapped.
So there are three steps to get ready to make a change. The three steps are; committing, understanding, and establishing a structure.
Committing, is about making a decision to begin. The more conscious the decision, it also means the more it is a plan of action, and therefore the more powerful it is.
Understanding, is about understanding how food works and once you understand how food works and your body works, you have the opportunity to fix not only your present reality but your inner workings.
Then comes establishing a structure. Structure is made of specific behaviours. You must be clear and specific about your commitment. In gaining understanding, your new behaviour must be doable, it must make sense. Once you find that it is actually doable, it must be repeatable, it must become a new habit and habits are the result of repetition. The structure, creates the environment that promotes the repetition, it has to be done again, and again, and again. This repetition then becomes joyful, which is the opposite of depressive living syndrome.
All of these things require support. Support might be to do with the people that you know, the books that you read, family. Or it could be the goals that you set for yourself, it could be informing a community online where you can think about it, write about it, listen to podcasts or read blogs that motivate you to move beyond your pain. All of these things are motivational and supportive of what you want to attain.
On the quest to lose 50 pounds in a year. Can she do it? Only time will tell....with the help of this blog.